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Thursday, December 22, 2005

Just a recap…

Monday: Massive yeast infection in pooch’s ear. Emergency vet visit, four hours missed of work, nice $117 vet bill.

Could have been worse:
Could have been a massive yeast infection somewhere else on yours truly.

Tuesday: 7am - Get hit from behind on rt. 78 by an SUV and then slammed into the car in front of us. Auto body quotes $4800 to fix it. 4:30pm - Quiznos forgets the bacon on the only joy of my day. 5:00pm - Traffic comes to complete halt on our commute home due to a jacked knifed tractor trailer preventing us from getting home before 9pm.

Could have been worse: Meteor could have fallen from sky, bursting into flames while crushing car, none of which is covered by insurance.

Wednesday: 7:30pm - attempt to leave from bag class but car wont start. Stranded outside in parking lot for an hour in 6 degrees until AAA comes.

Could have been worse: Could have been raining razors blades.

Thursday: 8am – attempt to push start car but ends up stuck in driveway and has to be towed by AAA to Strauss. 9am – spend $20 on taxi to take us to Hertz, where we spend $116 to rent car. 1pm – garage calls and says car is done and I have ultimately wasted my money on a rental. 6pm – pick up my car and give garage $135 for bad wire problem.

Hey, could have been worse: Rental car could have been a pea green Fiestiva.

Friday: Go to company Christmas party that night and spend what little money we have left on booze.

Not too bad, but could have been worse: Could have had no money to spend on booze and had to do favors to get some.

Monday: 5:30pm – Supposed to go Christmas shopping. Instead, sit in dead locked traffic from tanker fire on rt. 78. Lady in jeep lets go of break and rolls back into our front bumper. She ignores this fact. Earl gets out of car, walks up to her window and informs her of what she has done. She replies, “Oh, I didn’t notice” and rolls window back up. Earl gets back into car and bangs a U-ie off the highway. We take back roads home and arrive at house at 8pm. Christmas shopping is canceled.

Could have definately been worse: Space aliens could have burned us alive with laser beams.

Tuesday: 5:30pm – Supposed to go Christmas shopping. Instead, engine light starts flashing as we come home from work. Cavalier sounds like its running on 3 cylinders. Drive straight to Strauss and are told to leave it there. Wait for a ride while standing inside with a 30-pack of Bush, a bottle of wine, and a bottle of Tequila. 6:30pm – finally get home. Walk into kitchen to find two bored dogs have filled kitchen with 14lbs of kitty litter. 6:35pm – start crying. Christmas shopping is canceled. 7:00pm – stop crying and start making fudge for office Christmas party. 1am – finish making fudge. Total fudge – 8 lbs.

Could have been worse: A pack of cats could have broken into the kitchen and pooped on the floor.

Wednesday: 6:45am - Coworker comes from 25 minutes away to take us to work. 1pm – Strauss calls and reports the problem being a cracked coil cover. 4:30pm – drive work van home to pick up Cavalier. Bring Strauss $232.00 and fudge. 6:40pm – late to class, but at least I’m there.

Hey, could have been worse: Could have fallen in a ditch somewhere and eaten by badgers.

Thursday: Today – Last day before a four day weekend. No booze in site. Where’s my booze?

Could be worse: Could be dragged across a bed of ticks by devil midgets carrying porcelain dolls.

- My worst fear.