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Monday, May 02, 2005

So I got my soda down at the corner. Figured since I was there, I'd get some go-go juice for the car too. I paid my Indian friend $10 and went to pump it, when another Indian pulled up to ask me directions. He was a Virginia Indian so he had lost his way. I explained to him how to get to where he wanted to go, and turned around to see some guy had thrown my pump into his gas tank and was walking in to the store to prepay.

I let out a mighty, "hey hey", but that did no good and had to chase him into the store to explain that I hadn't started pumping yet. "You took too long" was the response I got from the Indian who was no longer my friend. I said I was giving directions to someone (an Indian brother, no less) and didn't have a chance to pump yet. So they made the other guy back up to the first pump and let me do my thing.

And this whole time, I am with wet-head. In fact, I am not only with wet-head, but I am with no-makeup face. I am feeling really attractive at this point. That was about to change.

After I pumped my gas, I pulled out of the parking lot, where two Puerto Rican guys start yelling "Ooooh hey girl! OOOoo."

I pulled my car out into the street and got in the left lane. There was another car next to me in the right lane, and my Puerto Rican fan club was behind that. I could hear them still trying to get my attention and I prayed that they weren't trying to tell me my car was on fire or something. I looked at the car next to me and saw it was making a right on red.

Nooo nooo, don't do it, don't turn.... Ahh... damn.

The Rican mobile floored it to get parallel to me.

"Heyyy Girlll"

I was just about to whip around and yell a great big WHAT??!! But at that exact moment, I got my green arrow to turn left...

Boy, are they lucky I didn't get a chance to lay my smack down on them.

And of course, now that I was far away, I thought of hundreds of witty comments I could have made to them because I was a bad ass and no one was going to make me nervous - Just in case, I checked the rear view mirror to make sure they weren't behind me.

My car and I arrived safely at the grocery store. I gave the tires a quick glance to make sure they hadn't flattened themselves or that no flames were protruding from underneath - you know, just to make sure those guys weren't trying to actually help me or anything. Because if there's one thing I can't stand, its when you are attempting to warn a woman that her dress is hanging out of her car door (or that her trunk is opened, stupid Mercedes woman) and she ignores you for fear you are trying to car jack her.

After that, nothing blogable happened. It's true. Not a single exciting thing at the grocery store occurred. They were out of Betty Crocker's Turtle Brownies, they don't carry Dietz & Watson cold cuts anymore, and they have never sold those deli hotdogs connected by the string that Earl wanted. My bill came to $77.77, which is just weird. I did get my pot for my rose bush and repotted it when I got home. I returned the movies to Blockbuster and picked up two more (Ginger Snaps II - also very good - and Blade Trinity which I have yet to watch).

Now I am at work and not feeling AT ALL like being here. Although when the first thing you see when getting your coffee is a left over sheet cake someone brought in from a birthday party over the weekend, how bad can a day be? It was a very impressive cake as they had scanned in a picture of the 50-year old birthday girl when she was 7-years old and imprinted it on the cake.
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On my list of things to do today that are work related, I have to RSVP an invitation Earl and I received to our CEO's 70th birthday party. That's work related, don't you think? We've never been invited to any of their parties before, but I guess this year they feel we are part of the family. That or Earl's joke about not ever being invited to anything just bit us in the ass. Careful what you wish for.

I also have to figure out what to do for Mom's Day this year. I think I may have over done the plant thing, so maybe some mom's out there have some ideas to share with me about what they would want.

I'll sit here and wait for that list. Chop chop, moms. Time's a-wasting.