Spookalot’s recipe for apple pie:

You will need the following apples -
2 Granny Smith
2 Rome
2 Golden Delicious
2 Macintosh
(In other words, way too many apples.)

Peel ‘em and chop ‘em. If you need lemon juice, you’re not chopping fast enough.

Defrost a package of two Marie Collander’s frozen deep-dish piecrusts.

Pile apples into one piecrust until it looks utterly ridiculous and physically impossible to bake. Keep in mind the height of the oven. Most likely, you will have a few apples that refuse to fit. Set aside for some other creation.

Add 1 box of raisins (cramming when necessary), 2 cups of brown sugar, an entire stick of melted butter, and a dash of vanilla extract.

Use fingers to wet edges of crust so top crust will stick.

Place second piecrust over top of apples. Do not remove crust’s tin at this time.

Using two hands and/or elbow, push as hard as you can to get the two crusts to meet, being careful not to spill anything out. Remove tin.

Pinch edges together so it looks pretty, pushing up on whichever side is most lop-sided.

At this point, it is very important that you realize you forgot to add the flour to thicken the mixture. Understand it’s too late now and do not attempt to open the pie back up.

Cut four pretty slices in top of crust so it may breathhhee.

Place pie on cookie sheet – very important. Bake at 425 until it looks done or about to blow up, which ever comes first.

Let cool. Slice and dish out with ladle.

Mmmm! Enjoy!!
Serves as many as you want it to depending on how much you put on the plates.